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Posts tagged ‘Truthfulness’

Spurn Spin – Honesty

HonestyWas Paul’s change in travel plans dishonest or fickle?

No, he explains. During a brief, painful visit to the church in Corinth, he’d told them when he planned to return. By then, he’d assumed, the church would have resolved its disunity.

When the time came for Paul’s scheduled return trip, however, the crisis hadn’t been fully resolved. Fearing that another visit just then might aggravate things, he decided to bypass Corinth and reschedule his visit.

Interact with God’s Word: 2 Corinthians 1:12-14, 17-19a, 23

  1. What two criticisms about bypassing Corinth (v. 17) does Paul anticipate or respond to?
  2. How does he characterize how “people of the world” make commitments?
  3. Why does Paul say (v. 18) he makes sure his word is reliable?
  4. What does Paul tell the Corinth church (v. 23) is the reason for putting off his visit?
  5. How does adding the sincerity element (v. 12) set the bar higher than technical honesty alone?
  6. How does Paul’s assertion that “there is nothing written between the lines” in his letters (v.13) flesh out what straightforward communication involves?
  7. Can you match Paul’s confidence and clear conscience (v. 12) about your own talk?

Spend Time in Prayer:  Ask God to help you filter spin out of your conversation so that it becomes transparently truthful.

2 Corinthians 1:12-14, 17-19a, 23

12 We can say with confidence and a clear conscience that we have been honest and sincere in all our dealings. We have depended on God’s grace, not on our own earthly wisdom. That is how we have acted toward everyone, and especially toward you. 13 My letters have been straightforward, and there is nothing written between the lines and nothing you can’t understand. I hope someday you will fully understand us, 14 even if you don’t fully understand us now. Then on the day when our Lord Jesus comes back again, you will be proud of us in the same way we are proud of you.

17 You may be asking why I changed my plan. Hadn’t I made up my mind yet? Or am I like people of the world who say yes when they really mean no? 18 As surely as God is true, I am not that sort of person. My yes means yes 19 because Jesus Christ, the Son of God, never wavers between yes and no. He is the one whom Timothy, Silas, and I preached to you, and he is the divine Yes–God’s affirmation.

23 Now I call upon God as my witness that I am telling the truth. The reason I didn’t return to Corinth was to spare you from a severe rebuke.

Prayer for the Week:  I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart.  But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others.  Help me to change.

 

Spurn Spin – Polite Prevarication

HonestyKey Bible Verse: Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old evil nature and all its wicked deeds.  – Colossians 3:9

Bonus Reading:  Jeremiah 9:3-9

When I started to scrutinize my own behavior, I was amazed—even horrified—by how often I was tempted to lie and by how often I did lie before I could stop myself.

For instance, seeing an old friend, I said, “Oh, it’s good to see you. I’ve been thinking about you so much recently.” In truth, I’d thought about this friend for only a fleeting moment a few days before our chance meeting. “So much” was more than an exaggeration; it was a lie that slipped out before I could catch it.

I know I’m not alone. Christians find it all too easy to say things such as “I’ve been praying for you” when they really haven’t been.

Or their excuses for declining an invitation leave truth in the dust. “I’m sorry, I have another engagement” sounds so much better than “I really prefer not to have dinner with you.”

Lying pervades our society. We may have become so accustomed to truth twisting that we don’t recognize the tendency until we shine the piercing light of Scripture on our lives.

If over the next few days you pay close attention to your interactions with others, odds are you’ll find yourself struggling to be fully honest.

—Mark Roberts in Dare to Be True

My Response: This weekend I’ll monitor how much my words compromise the truth.

Thought to Apply: When you add to the truth, you subtract from it.—Talmud

Adapted from Dare to Be True (WaterBrook, 2003)

Prayer for the Week: I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart. But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others. Help me to change.

Spurn Spin – Contagious Candor

HonestyKey Bible Verse: In the end, people appreciate frankness more than flattery.  – Proverbs 28:23

Bonus Reading:  2 Corinthians 1:12-14, 17-19a, 23

After I preached on spurning spin, Steve promised himself and God that he would no longer place blame elsewhere to excuse his own behavior. A few days later, he told me, he failed to allow enough driving time to make it to a meeting.

Arriving 20 minutes after the meeting began, he took his seat and apologized. “I’m sorry I’m late,” he began. “I can only blame my own poor choices. I didn’t allow enough time to get here. Please forgive me.”

His honesty stunned everyone in the room. Finally, the meeting leader said, “Well, I’m sorry you’re late too, but thanks for being honest about why. That’s the kind of openness we need in this meeting.”

A lively conversation on the benefits of greater honesty in their business ensued. Then another person entered the room out of breath, offering the usual blame-everything-else kind of excuse. The others laughed because this man’s spin looked foolish in light of Steve’s gutsy honesty.

Steve said that the quality of conversation for the rest of the meeting was unusually frank. The same tone continued in the days that followed. His renunciation of spin was contagious and transformed the work environment.

—Mark Roberts in Dare to Be True

My Response: Have I found telling the frank truth more often resented or appreciated?

Thought to Apply: Nothing more completely baffles one who is full of tricks and duplicity than straightforward and simple integrity in another.—Charles Caleb Colton

Adapted from Dare to Be True (WaterBrook, 2003)

Prayer for the Week: I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart. But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others. Help me to change.

Spurn Spin – Ends and Means

HonestyKey Bible Verse: I speak the truth and hate every kind of deception. … There is nothing crooked or twisted. Proverbs 8:7-8

Bonus Reading:  1 Thessalonians 2:1-5

At the church college group I began attending as a freshman, the college pastor delivered a stirring message on sharing the gospel with our friends. Then he passed out a “Religious Interest Survey” that featured a series of questions leading up to the clincher: “What do you believe about Jesus?” He urged us to use it to poll students in our dorms, then invited questions.

“What’s the deadline for getting these surveys back to you?” I asked.

The pastor responded with a chuckle, “Oh, don’t worry about that. We aren’t going to tabulate the results. This is simply a way to get people talking about Jesus.”

“But if we tell people this is a survey,” I followed up nervously, “aren’t we implying that we actually care about their answers? Is it honest to call this a survey when we’re not really surveying what people think?”

“Look,” he replied with a touch of irritation, “it’s a survey; we’re just not tabulating the answers. Lots of businesses and churches do things like this. It’s just a conversation starter. If you don’t want to do it, you don’t have to.”

I didn’t take any “surveys” back to campus. Nor did I return to that college group.

—Mark Roberts in Dare to Be True

My Response: Where am I expected to bend the truth? Have I gone along?

Thought to Apply: Some people live their whole lives just around the corner from the world of truth. —CARL F. H. HENRY (journalist, theologian)

Adapted from Dare to Be True (WaterBrook, 2003)

Prayer for the Week: I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart. But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others. Help me to change.

Spurn Spin – Lying Lips, Quivering Knees

HonestyKey Bible Verse: Truth stands the test of time; lies are soon exposed. Proverbs 12:19

Bonus Reading:  John 8:31-36

During my mid-twenties, when people asked me if I played any sports in high school, I’d always say, “Yeah, I ran track and played soccer.” Technically, that was true. I’d run around the track and I did play soccer—in P.E. class. I was never on either the soccer or track team at good ol’ Tucker High school.

But somewhere along the way I’d begun believing that a real, respectable, worthwhile man had to have accomplished something athletically. Every time I told that lie, I felt terrible and vowed not to repeat it. But I couldn’t bring myself to look somebody in the eye and say, “No, I never participated in a team sport.”

Finally, during my third year in seminary, of all places, I was forced to deal with this character flaw. A friend of mine rushed up to me at church and said he had some great news: he thought because of my athletic experience he could work it out for me to become chaplain for the SMU football team. My heart sank down into my socks. My friend was thrilled. And I felt like throwing up.

That’s when I knew I had a real problem. After a week of real soul searching, I got busy replacing those lies with truth, and soon I was free.

—Andy Stanley in Louder than Words

My Response: From what entangling deception do I need to break free?

Thought to Apply: You didn’t tell a lie, you just left a big hole in the truth.—Helen Thomas (journalist)

Adapted from Louder than Words (Multnomah, 2004)

Prayer for the Week:  I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart. But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others. Help me to change.

Spurn Spin – Out for a Spin

HonestyKey Bible Verse:  So put away all falsehood and “tell your neighbor the truth” because we belong to each other. Ephesians 4:25

Bonus Reading:  Zechariah 8:16-17

When my high-school friend Mike first received his driver’s license, his mom allowed him to use her car but forbade him to drive on the freeway. But Mike and I were convinced that we knew better than his mother, and bravely challenged the California freeways.

Knowing that his mom might question us about Mike’s driving, however, we crafted a brilliant spin on our behavior. Sure enough, after one of our illicit road trips, his mom asked bluntly, “Mike, did you drive on the freeway today?”

Without hesitation and with a hurt tone in his voice, Mike answered. “Mom, I know the rules. Of course I drove on the surface streets.” As he spoke, I nodded fervently. (Mike did know the rules and we had driven on the surface streets—on our way to the freeway.)

The combination of Mike’s earnest testimony and my bobbing head duped Mike’s mom. She apologized for questioning his integrity, and Mike avoided losing his driving privileges.

We didn’t tell an outright lie, but fabricated a deceptive half-truth. This was spin, pure and simple, because we intended to mislead, while failing to confess the truth that deserved to be spoken.

—Mark Roberts in Dare to Be True

My Response: Have I recently spun the truth for self–protection or self–promotion?

Adapted from Dare to Be True (WaterBrook, 2003)

Prayer for the Week: I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart. But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others. Help me to change.

Spurn Spin – Here’s the Pitch

HonestyWho Said It…Mark Roberts

Mark has been senior pastor of Irvine Presbyterian Church in Irvine, California for 14 years.  Before that he was education pastor at the First Presbyterian Church of Hollywood. Dr. Roberts’s degrees are from Harvard University.

Mark is an active blogger (www.markdroberts.com).  He enjoys hanging out with his wife Linda and their two children, biking, and playing “home improvement” around the house.

What He Said…Here’s the Pitch

As a major league pitcher puts spin on a curve ball to confuse a batter, so the verbal spinner twists the truth to keep the listener off balance.

Spin, said former CNN Crossfire host Bill Press, is hard to define. “It’s not the truth. Neither is it a lie. Spin lies somewhere in between: almost telling the truth, but not quite; bending the truth to make things look as good—or as bad—as possible; painting things in the best—or worst—possible light.”

We can’t escape spin. Politicians spin their positions. Advertisers spin their products. Coaches spin their losses. Students spin their low grades. Spouses spin their marital messes. Corporate executives spin their bottom lines. Employees spin their mistakes.

Most of us can spin with the best of them, saying things that are true in some sense, but not speaking the full truth that ought to be spoken. And we excuse our lack of truthfulness or even congratulate ourselves on our cleverness.

Adapted from Dare to Be True (WaterBrook, 2003)

Prayer for the Week: I realize, Lord, that You desire honesty from the heart. But I kid myself and fudge the truth to impress others. Help me to change.