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A Relationship Redefined – Commuter Marriage

FamilyKey Bible Verse: This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united. Genesis 2:24

Bonus Reading: Genesis 24:50-61

Doug’s dad had deserted, leaving his mom to sacrifice for her son’s welfare. So when Lisa, Doug’s new wife, began experiencing tensions with her mother-in-law, Doug sided with the woman who’d always been his hero—his mother. Whenever Doug suggested to Lisa changes in her behavior, she suspected he was parroting his mother’s concerns, and resisted. The icy intensity between wife and mother grew.

“How can I get Lisa to make these reasonable changes my mother wants her to make?” Doug asked his valued friend Sam.

“It sounds to me like you need to run away from home,” Sam said, quoting Genesis 2:24. “You’ve been trying to live in two homes. When you got married, you moved your stuff in with Lisa, but your heart never left your mother. This is your deal, my friend—not Lisa’s. Until you completely move in with Lisa, you’ll never get this fixed.”

Doug resolved that whenever Lisa and his mother were on opposite sides of an issue, he’d side with Lisa. Over the next months, Doug’s mother tried anger, tears, and guilt. Competing with Lisa, he told her, was a battle she’d lose.

—M. Robert Wolgemuth in The Most Important Year in a Man’s Life

My Response: Have I declared my primary loyalty to my wife in a way that’s clear to both her and my parents?

Adapted from The Most Important Year in a Man’s Life (Zondervan, 2003)

Prayer for the Week: Lord, I realize that honoring my parents is a part of fully honoring You. Help me to lovingly fulfill this obligation.


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